Sunday, February 26, 2012

With a thong in my heart

 People like to turn buttons – I think it harkens back to the acquisition of the opposable thumb.  So, being fully evolved with the aforementioned opposable thumb, I couldn’t resist turning the knob located by the iWhatever adapter in my new car.  It was marked only “L to H.”  Arrogance told me that mean low to high – a supplemental volume control for the iPod streaming through the audio system.

I was driving to Boca, and as I’m want to do, I made an iMix that ran the same time as a round trip.  Less than a ½ mile from home, I discovered that nifty supplemental volume thing didn’t work.  Well, it was a new car - probably just a new car glitch the dealer – made a mental note to mention it when I took the car in for the 500 mile once over.

Being a woman of a ‘certain age,’ hot flashes come and go.  As I was driving, I noticed I was having a new, special kind of hot flash.  The backs of my thighs, buttocks and um, my nasty bits were heating up with each passing mile – and not in a good way.  All I could think was that I really did need to run out and get that ‘Menopause is Your Friend’ book I’ve been procrastinating about buying.  Procrastinating because buying the book signals surrender and acceptance.  I’m still not at a place where aging gracefully is a concept I’m comfy with.

Then again, I wasn’t real comfy with the backside hot flash, either.  I was also feeling a little snippy, so I turned off my iMix and switched the magic knob to off.  Listening to blue humor on XM radio was sure to get me out of my ‘I don’t wanna grow old’ funk.  It did, but not in the way you’re probably thinking.  See, it wasn’t a new kind of hot flash – the magic knob was the on-off switch for the seat heater.  Note to self – the new car manual is more important than the opposable thumb.

The Rhonda Pollero store is open for business (, though I can’t wait for my web designer to go in and fix the colors – right now it looks like mud, but I know my woonderful computer geek friends will work their magic and make it visually appealing.  The hottest seller since the store opened?  The thong with the crime scene flamingo on it and the words ‘Creating Trouble in Paradise’ printed on it.  Who knew????

The store isn’t about greed or ego, any money earned from sales will go to The Kyle McKinley Pollero Scholarship.  My husband and I established the scholarship in 1999 after our 13-year-old son died.  In the 11 years the scholarship has been awarded, 14 young people have received full tuition and expenses to Anne Arundel (the college where my hubby taught for 33 years).  We’ve almost reached the goal of the scholarship being self-sustaining (the interest alone covers the scholarship awards).  We’re really close to making that a reality, so I thought what the heck – might as well have some fun raising money.    Rhonda

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